Last September an article on BBC radio’s ‘All in the Mind’ series considered how people can feel a sense of grief and loss when a celebrity or high-profile person dies. How can we explain genuine feelings of grief when we don’t know someone, and have probably never even met them?
FEELINGS OF GRIEF AND LOSS
The article was prompted by a letter from a listener after the death of Dr Michael Mosley in June 2024. The listener said she had found herself grieving his death as if it were that of a dear friend. She explained the grief was so intense, especially in the evenings when she used to listen to his podcasts. She wondered what type of grief this is and how it might be overcome.
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To help answer this question, long-term show presenter Claudia Hammond spoke with psychologist Dr. Dara Greenwood from Vassar College in New York and sociologist Ruth Penfold-Mounce from York University. She began by asking Dr. Greenwood why the death of a celebrity can affect us so profoundly, even if we did not know them personally. The doctor explained that although it might seem odd at first glance, it is fundamentally human to emotionally engage with others beyond physical proximity. We can feel connected to and mourn the loss of individuals we have never met, which extends naturally to celebrities and other public figures through media exposure.
She went on to say ‘We have all these wonderful ways of emotionally engaging with other people in our lives in ways that are not always about who is physically in front of us. So we can feel connected to and or mourn the loss of a colleague we kind of know, or a distant relative we’ve met once.’
STRONG CONNECTIONS
Professor Penfold-Mounce elaborated by explaining the nature of these relationships, and how such attachments should not be seen as trivial. This type of grief can be as real as that experienced for personal acquaintances:
‘I think the grief that we feel for these celebrities is really related to the connection that we have with them. It can be incredibly strong and I don’t think that should be underestimated. We can’t just dismiss it. We form these attachments and even if they aren’t being formed back to us, that attachment is real. So that grief can also be very much experienced as real.’
The listener felt a heightened sense of loss in the evenings, because that’s when she used to listened to Dr Mosley’s podcasts. Suddenly when you don’t hear that voice anymore, there’s an emptiness in your life. And that is a grieving point.
These connections are sometimes referred to as parasocial relationships.
PARASOCIAL GRIEF
When discussing whether certain age groups or types of people are more prone to parasocial grief, Dr. Greenwood noted that the way in which individuals identify with the celebrity matter significantly. For example, young women who identified with Princess Diana were most affected by her sudden death.
Despite never having met her, so many people around the world felt a profound sense of loss and grief. This was largely due to the strong emotional connections they had formed with her through media coverage and her public persona. Many identified with her struggles and admired her humanitarian efforts, creating a bond that felt very real. When she died, the outpouring of grief was immense, with people placing flowers, letters, and other mementos at public memorial sites.
OVERCOMING PARASOCIAL GRIEF
Reflecting on the listener’s original question, Claudia asked how can people overcome the grief they feel following a death of a celebrity? Professor Penfold-Mounce suggested part of the benefit of gathering, either in person or virtually, is the community validation that individuals receive. Sometimes scholars have talked about experiences of disenfranchised grief (feeling a loss that doesn’t always fit in with social norms) in relation to celebrity deaths, where others might question how an individual can be affected by a person they never met.
In cases like Princess Diana’s, this is less likely to occur due to her high profile. Acknowledging, validating, and understanding the emotional bond someone may have had with a deceased celebrity or media figure can help in processing grief. However, it can become problematic if it leads to persistent rumination and an inability to move beyond feelings of loss. Generally, discussing these feelings with others and working through the emotions productively can be beneficial.
The professor remarked that public mourning, such as the outpouring of grief following Princess Diana’s death, has become more commonplace. Creating shrines and leaving offerings can be part of the grieving process or act of curiosity.
GRIEF AND FICTIONAL CHARACTERS
Social media has changed the way we grieve, providing platforms for shared memories and emotions. Dr. Greenwood cited a study where fans responded to the death of a character on the show House, suggesting that even fictional portrayals can evoke grief-related emotions. Social media allows for communal validation of these feelings.
Addressing how to overcome grief following a celebrity’s death, Dr. Greenwood emphasized the importance of community validation and the acknowledgment of emotional bonds. If grief becomes rumination, seeking productive ways to process emotions is advisable. That might include seeking help from a trained therapist.
POSITIVE OUTCOMES
Finally, both experts acknowledged potential positive outcomes from parasocial grief, highlighting the sense of community and connection formed around high-profile figures. Sharing information about how a celebrity or public figure died might lead to greater knowledge about health issues and raise awareness about diseases.
The episode can be found in full on BBC Sounds.
